Sometimes you just want to curl up under a big pile of pillows and let the world spin on without you.
Today was one of those days for me. I was just feeling quite overwhelmed by life. However, I could not hunker down with a Party-Size bag of M&Ms and a chick-flick as I desired, but had to go to class, and do my homework, and make dinner, and go to work, and walk the dog, and just generally be a productive member of society. When I am feeling a little blue or overwhelmed, I find myself doing things not to my full potential, making little mistakes and things like that. For example, today I came back into the house and left my keys in the lock on the door. For several hours. It’s a good thing we live in a safe neighborhood, otherwise poor Ferdinand Car would be long gone, destined to be loved by another.
Another example, the dog is sometimes picky about when she will go outside: she won’t go out if the sprinklers are on, or if there’s a bird on the neighbor’s bird feeder, or if our upstairs neighbors are sweeping their porch. She’s a delicate dog, I suppose. Well, she was standing at the door looking out, but not going out, and I didn’t have time for that today. So I picked her up to help her across the threshold, perhaps a little roughly, and promptly slammed her face into the closed screen door. So that’s why you weren’t walking out… Poor dog.
The hubs must have been feeling a little blue in his dreams the other night, too. I was laying in bed, wondering who’s idea it had been to have the dumpsters emptied at 3:30 in the morning when the hubs rolled over to face me and started talking.
Hubs: I am not happy about this!
Me: Hmm…you can’t sleep either, Buddy?
Hubs (sounding very irritated): The cost is just…it’s just way too high! Much higher than it should be.
Ah, so he’s asleep.
Me: Oh? The cost of what?
Hubs: Look, you need to take this seriously! The cost is just way to high! I am not happy.
Me: Yeah, I got that…
Hubs: And, you’re not helping!
Me (upset to be yelled at, even if he was asleep): Well, I would help, if you would just tell me what’s going on!
Hubs (getting very angry): It’s just too high! The cost of it… and I don’t think you know what’s going on. You just leave me alone!
Me: What? I’m trying to help you!
Hubs: You’re being a huge grump! Leave me ALONE!
Me (irrationally upset): What’s your problem?!?!
Hubs: Yeah, you’re being just ridiculous!
Me: Well, FINE!
Then I rolled over and tried to go to sleep, upset that he would have such a rude tone with me. A couple of minutes later the hubs reached over and wrapped an arm around me.
Me: Hey! Don’t hug me! You were being really rude!
I’m not rational at 3:30 in the morning.
Hubs (looking at me with bleary eyes, now awake): Hmmm…what’s wrong baby? You ok?
I told him I was not ok, as he had yelled at me in his sleep. And because he has endless patience, he apologized for hurting my feelings, and said he would try to not do it again. And then he went back to sleep.
I do not know what made him so upset in his sleep that night, but I hope that it got resolved. At the very least, I hope that he felt better in the morning. That’s how it always is: everything looks better in the morning. Tomorrow is a new day, and has the potential to be a full day in which I will not slam the poor dog into any screen doors. And it will be another day to spend with the hubs, which makes even my bluest days better.